“Caesar should have been a vegan” salad!

What green bitches bring to a pizza party.

If you don’t know who Isa Chandra Moskowitz is you’re missing out in the vegan game. She has two successful restuarants in Brooklyn and Omaha where you can get delicious dishes in a swanky environment, a date night type feel that is sometimes missed from our community. She’s also authored almost a dozen cookbooks and posts recipes on her blog and Instagram. She’s also my boss so I get to learn lots of fun things heheheheheheh.

Anyway this recipe she just posted a few days ago on Instagram and I wanted to make it again to bring to a pizza party last night.

What you gonna buy: (serves 4 as full meal, 6 as appetizers)

-1lb Brussel sprouts

-1 thing of kale

-3-4 Portobello mushrooms

-1 box of baby arugula

-1 avocado


-1 cup soaked cashews separated and used twice

-1/4 cup lemon juice

-3 cloves garlic sliced

-1/4 tsp whole grain Dijon mustard

-1/2 sheet nori

-3/4 cups water

-1/4 cup nutritional yeast (nooch)

-2 tbls olive oil

-3/4 teaspoon salt

-fresh black pepper

Start by setting your oven to 350 degrees and get a baking sheet ready with parchment paper. First thing I’m gonna teach is how to clean your mushrooms! DON’T USE WATER! They will quickly become a soggy destroyed mess. Any dirt you see you can wipe off with a fancy kitchen brush to help save the planet or sin and use a paper towel. After that you are going to gently twist and pull the stems off. My mushrooms were already broken (THANK YOU GROCERY STORE DOWN THE STREET) which was fine but don’t do as I do, do as I say OK?! Now take a spoon and you need to scrape out the gills of the mushroom. It’s ultra satisify so enjoy this part.


You know you want to scrape them…

Now for your Brussel sprouts! You’ll need to trim them and I’ll save you the googling (you’re welcome) and tell you what to do. Take either a chefs or paring knife (which ever one you sharpen regularly) and slice off the bottom nub. A few leafs may fall this is fine. If you see any discolored ones you can gently pop them off to. After that slice them babies in half the long way, if you do it the other way you’d be just chopping off the tops.


See. Simple.         

Take your halved Brussel sprouts and mushroom caps and transfer to a baking sheet. Make sure that the mushrooms are sitting upright like a little dirt bowl, and that the Brussel sprouts are all either facing down or up; helpful for when you flip them.


Amazing how rustic you look when you treat your baking sheet like sh*t.

Now get olive all love them and sprinkle some salt. Pop them in and set a timer for around 15 minutes. Now I have THE WORST oven, like two pilots don’t even work bad, and your timing and heat control may be different. The best advice is always check on your food and if things aren’t cooking enough turn up the heat (except in baking I would not mess with that science). After about 15 minutes (or until the Brussel sprouts look slightly roasted) pull the entire sheet out. Take a fork and a serving utensil thingy bring one mushroom to the sink and use the two tools to kind of push a little on the center of the mushroom and drain the filled water that’s pooled since cooking, repeat on all of them and transfer back to the tray this time face down. Then just flip all of the brussel sprouts, and bring back to the oven setting an additional 10 minute timer (for me it was about 15 minutes plus cranking up the heat to 400).

For the dressing please note you should soak cashews for about a day IMO. Some say only 3 hours, I have a Ninja blender that I like. If you have a Vitamix you may not even need to soak. But if you have a very basic blender you will want them to have soaked in water for quite a while. I leave a mason jar in my fridge with some soaking at all times because hipster is as hipster does.

Take 1/2 cup of cashews, the water, the half nori sheet broken into pieces, garlic, olive oil, lemon juice, and nutritional yeast adding them all to the blender. Start blending on high for one minute and then let it rest. Do this about three times and then you can add your second batch of cashews, salt, pepper, and Dijon mustard. Keep blending until you’ve gotten the cashews to smooth out. You can now add this to your washed kale and arugula to begin massaging it in.


This is how you want the dressing to look. IT TASTES SO GOOD.

Once your dressing is really incorporated with the kale and arugula dice an avocado. When your sprouts and shrooms are done take them out of the oven. Slice your mushrooms on a bias and you can plate your food!


A few friends of mine were doing a pizza party and I thought this was a great dish to bring that would compliment the food of the evening. However I forgot that my friend who was the host was allergic to avocado and didn’t know her husband was allergic to mushrooms.

So you know what I did?


I ate the whole f*#%ing platter myself 🙂

Hope everyone has a great weekend! Let me know if you have any other good party recipes you’ve tried!



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